Life Is a Mirror. As Within, So Without.

In our early twenties, we plan everything based on what we think life will be. We have it all figured out, a checklist of milestones waiting to be ticked off. But then, by 25 or later, reality hits us hard.

Dreams get delayed, expectations fall apart, and suddenly, we are just trying to survive the day.

Recently, I had a conversation that shifted my perspective on life in a way I didn’t expect. It opened my eyes to things about myself I hadn’t really noticed before.

Stepping out of the familiar

Each person we meet and conversation we have, act like a mirror. Life has a way of teaching us through the people around us, especially when we take the courage to step outside what’s familiar.

For a long time, I felt comfortable around friends my age. There was a sense of familiarity and ease in talking to people who were, more or less, in the same stage of life.

But one day, I decided to reach out and connect with people in their early to mid-thirties. At first, it felt like we didn’t have much in common. But the more time I spent with them, the more I began to see that I was missing something beautiful, a deeper meaning of life.

They were not just sharing stories, they were sharing lessons about living fully. And little by little, their way of thinking opened me up to new ways of seeing my own life.

Perspective on marriage

Their perspectives opened my eyes to new ways of seeing life, especially on topics like marriage. As we get older, marriage comes up in conversation more, and it’s something we cannot avoid.

I noticed that they were not in a rush to hit society’s “milestones”. Instead, they were making choices based on what felt right for them. Maybe their past experiences taught them not to settle for less.

When I was in my early twenties, I used to wonder and question why some people weren’t married by the time they reached 30. Back then, I thought life was simple and smooth. Finish your studies, get a job, and then get married. Ah, it all seemed so straightforward. But the reality turned out to be nothing like that.

Looking back, I realize how narrow my thinking used to be.

But now, in my late twenties, I understand that these people were not delaying marriage out of fear or uncertainty. 

They were busy building lives that felt true to them, exploring their own passions, traveling, growing in their careers, and making decisions on their own terms, not just following society’s timeline.

And something shifted inside me.

Photo by ntrhzaini on Pinterest

Reflecting my own path

For the first time, I felt like it was okay not to rush. I didn’t have to check off every box just to feel like I was “on track.” 

Life isn’t a strict timeline that everyone has to follow. And the only timeline that matters is the one that feels right for me. 

I've been living trying to meet other people’s expectations and even my own. I felt that I had to have everything in order by a certain age. But now I see that it’s okay to live life on my terms, even if that looks different from what others might expect. 

Life is a journey, not a race, and there’s no need to force myself onto a path that doesn’t feel right.

Perspective on love

Life is more than just looking for love. 

True love will come at the right time, and it’s not the only thing that gives our lives meaning. When we stop seeing love as the only source of happiness, we open up to other experiences that are waiting to find us. 

Now, I finally understand that Allah SWT made certain things halal and haram for a reason. Something gained through haram will never bring true peace and true fulfillment. 

Becoming best self

I just want to build a life that’s meaningful and fulfilling on its own terms. My focus is on becoming the best version of myself. Not perfection, but the best version of my heart, my mind, and my soul.

I believe the right person deserves the best version of me. He deserves someone who’s whole, who’s ready to build a life based on respect, understanding, and love. And in return, I deserve that too, the space to be myself, fully and unapologetically.

Different dreams

What I wish more people to understand is that it’s okay to have different dreams. It’s okay if our journeys look different. 

Instead of pushing our own timelines onto others, we should celebrate each other’s milestones, whatever they may be.

For some people, getting married is a dream they’ve held onto for years. For others, priorities may include career growth, travel, or self-discovery before settling down. 

All of these paths are valid, and each person’s journey deserves respect.

Life is richer because of these differences, and that’s what makes it so beautiful. Because, at the end of the day, the only timeline that truly matters is our own.